Robbies Jokes

A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports carand was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.The cop asked to see the blonde’s driver’s license. She dug through herpurse and was getting progressively more agitated.”What does it look like?” she finally asked.The policewoman replied, “It’s square and it has your picture on it.”The driver finally found a square mirror, looked at it and handed it tothe policewoman. “Here it is,” she said.The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying,”Okay, you can go. I didn’t realize you were a cop.”

An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work onscaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, “Corned beef and cabbage! IfI get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I’m going to jumpoff this building.”The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, Burritos again! If I getburritos one more time I’m going to jump off, too.”The blond opened his lunch and said, Bologna again! If I get a bolognasandwich one more time, I’m jumping too.”The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef andcabbage, and jumped to his death. The Mexican opened his lunch, saw aburrito, and jumped, too. The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bolognaand jumped to his death as well.At the funeral, the Irishman’s wife was weeping. She said, “If I’d knownhow really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would havegiven it to him again!” The Mexican’s wife also wept and said, “I couldhave given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn’t realize he hated burritos somuch.”Everyone turned and stared at the blonde’s wife. The blonde’s wife said,”Don’t look at me. He makes his own lunch.”

Why did the blonde return her new scarf?It was too tight.

Why shouldn’t blondes have coffee breaks?It takes too long to retrain them.

Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air?She missed.

What do you see when you look into a blondes eyes?The back of her head.

Why did the blonde crash her plane when landing?Because the runway was only 25ft long, but a mile wide.

Why did the blonde climb the glass wall?To see what was on the other side.

Two blondes are passing by a fruit shop when the grocer calls to them, “Bananas! 50 cents each or three for a dollar!”The girls stop and look at each other. “Well I suppose we could always eat the third one!”

An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess; the route they were flying had a stay-over in another city. Upon their arrival the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day’s route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up, wondering what happened to her.She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn’t get out of her room.”You can’t get out of your room?” the captain asked, “Why not?”The stewardess replied: “There are only three doors in here,” she sobbed, “one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a signon it that says ‘Do Not Disturb’!”